improvidence

Step right up, STEP RIGHT UP! Come one, come all and see the Magnificent Madeleine Heil! This gal is dropping jaws like it’s martial law, she’s packing the house like Santa Klaus. Because folks, you know you’ll get a present when this pheasant is present, she’ll always be pleasant to even a peasant!

And speaking of peasants, who do we have here? Yes, you! In the stripes! Don’t believe me? Come on in and see! I won’t charge you, it’s free! But I do have to pay the bills to wet the gills, if ya’ know what I mean, so don’t be a peeve, give a tip when you leave! The tip jar’s a hip jar and it’s right on the strip bar, but that doesn’t mean we’re that kind of establishment, ‘caus we ain’t! Hurry along now, Mr. Peasant man! His toes knows where the shows goes! Right inside! Right this way sir!

I like that hat sir, but it’s a little too big for your head, to be perfectly honest.

Ah yes, pretty lady, come on up, step right in! If you give her a quarter she’ll douse you all with water, if you give her a dime she’ll sprinkle some thyme, if you give her a nickel she’ll call you fickle, and don’t even ask what happens if you give her a penny ‘caus I seen it and it isn’t pretty one bit!

What’s that, sir?

No, you don’t have to beg sir, she’ll become an egg sir. She’s got more charm sir than a fire alarm, sir, more fresh bread sir than cousin Fred, sir, she’s got an act sir that ain’t never been hacked sir, you’ll love this Madame’s shimmy shimmy shabam, sir! This girl can cancan like Jan can, and Jan can cancan like a flan pan from Uzbekistan!

So come right in, come in and see! You’ll love this gal, that’s a guarantee!